David A. Fields Consulting Group Some rejections are devastating. Like, “No, I don’t want to marry you,” or, “Sorry, your voice isn’t good enough to play the silent tree in this year’s Nutcracker.“
Here’s another punch in the gut: “We decided not to award the consulting project to your consulting firm.“
But, could there be a silver lining or, at least, a project down the road after you lose a consulting project?
Yes.
Let’s say a prospect decides not to hire you for their consulting project. After you console yourself with a giant bag of M&Ms, consider the three possible results your client could achieve based on their choice, and the implications for you.
Client’s results are excellent:
Learn something
The fact is, you’re not the only smart macaroon at the consulting dessert bar.
When a prospect achieves an outstanding result without you, find out how they succeeded.
Perhaps they (or another firm) found an approach you can incorporate to improve your offering.
Client’s results are bad:
Save the day and win a project
Although the client may be gun-shy after their preferred course of action failed, they need you more than ever.
Offer to step in and potentially propose a success-based fee structure.
That’s a golden opportunity for you to win a high-margin, love-you-forever consulting project.
Client’s results are mediocre:
Strengthen the relationship
Clients who achieve uninspired results harbor little urgency or desire to invest more into solving their problem.
They have consulting fatigue. (For now.)
Offer advice on how to turn their mediocre results into strong performance.
Your immediate reward will be minimal; however, you’ll emerge as the top contender for their next project.
In all cases, the success of your action depends on follow-up.
Follow-up is easiest if you set expectations with the prospect up front, when you lost the project.
It sounds like this:
You: No worries on awarding the chocolate chips efficiency project to McBozo Consulting. Would it be okay with you if I follow up to find out how the project is going?
Prospect: Sure
You: Terrific. When do you think a good time might be. Maybe after three months?
Prospect: Yes, by then we should have our revised chips line fully in place.
You: Great. Let’s set up a time in August…
Three months later, at the agreed-to time:
You: Back in May we set today on the calendar to follow up. I know you started the chips project about twelve weeks ago with McBozo Consulting, and I thought I’d check in to see how it’s going.
<conversation ensues>
You: Have there been any big learnings out of the project so far? I learn from my clients all the time, so I’d love to hear any big “Aha”s that have surfaced.
<more conversation>
You: When we were chatting about the project, I recall you mentioning that reorienting the liquor funnels was one of the major challenges. Has that turned out to be the case?
You: And I know you had high hopes that reorienting the liquor funnels would deliver 25% throughput gains. Most companies don’t achieve those numbers and I’m really curious to find out how you’re doing so far.
To be successful with the approach outlined above, keep three points in mind:
- You’re not trying to sell.
- Take genuine interest in your client’s progress.
- Diffuse your prospect’s propensity to become defensive. They won’t want to admit that their decision was wrong.
The more you focus on sincerely learning from your prospects, the more likely they are to share openly.
Have you ever had an initial rejection turn into a project later on? Do tell!
Text and images are © 2026 David A. Fields, all rights reserved.
Thank you for this kind advice! This is helpful, both for W2 gigs and for 1099/C2C gigs as well. In real tai chi, investment in loss is a term used to understand that yielding is a tactic, and that retreat is a tactic not a surrender. Sometimes, a potential client needs to see an example of what is out there, so they have a comparison of what you really offer, including the intangibles. I am in the midst of possibly executing a strategy that you speak about here currently with a previous consulting company and third party client. Thank you for your guidance and usual astute commentary here David. Thank you!
Love the tai chi reference, Michael! You’re right, often a client needs to experience the pain first-hand before they’re ready to accept help surmounting hurdles in front of them.
Thanks for jumping in with your thoughts!
I have been practicing and teaching Chinese kung fu, wrestling, and Filipino weapons for almost 50 years, been doing real Yang Tai Chi for over 30 years. The investment in loss concept, and the yielding/filling precepts of the movements are balancing and essential. This, lol, is why the line in the Yin/Yang circle is curved and not rigidly straight. Cannot thank you enough for all of your insight and those of the people you bring on. Please keep it going! I have almost finished your book Guide to Winning Clients!
You rock, Michael. And the reason the stick figures in the book have wobbly features isn’t because I can’t draw a rigidly straight line, it’s because I wanted them to retain flexibility… we’ll go with that. 😉
LOL, my nickname in the martial arts circles, along with Texas Mike because my Chinese Sifu and second father could not say my last name, was and is Gumby! Even after two knee replacements and one hip replacement, I can still do my splits, kick over my head, etc, but teach kung fu practice tai chi these days, in the art, and in life/business lol! Thank you for everything David, trying to get the next gig right now while in the meantime working as an ARB Property Tax protest member reviewing and hearing protests for the County Appraisal District I live in, and teaching martial arts locally and on Zoom.
Thinking right-side up: Why would the prospect want to a) share the competitor’s name with you and b) schedule/spend extra time with you to “report” on the project?
In your conversation:
“You: No worries on awarding the chocolate chips efficiency project to McBozo Consulting. Would it be okay with you if I follow up to find out how the project is going?
Prospect: Sure” – I could rather see them saying: “Why?/Nah, we’re fine.” (and thinking: “I don’t owe you an update; it’s enough if I have to deal with the McBozos now…”)
I’m sure you have a chocolaty reason, David, to get them to open up 😉
Interesting question, Franziska. The follow-up request is signaling, “I still am interested in you and your challenge even though you turned me down.” Few people object to being cared about. It’s important to not signal, “Hey, can I try selling you again in 3 months?”
Will clients tell you who they went with? Yes. The vast majority of the time they will. Remember, presumably you’ve built up a relationship with some level of Like and Trust with the decision-maker, else, why were you proposing? (If this were an RFP situation, then you wouldn’t be in a position to have the conversation in the first place, so it wouldn’t apply.) So, you have enough relationship equity to make a reasonable ask.
They’re not thinking, “I don’t owe you…” They’re thinking, “I turned this person down and I was really anxious about doing that because it’s not fun to reject anyone, especially someone you like. And this consultant was SO thoughtful and generous about it. Wow, what a relief. I like them even more. I’m happy to help them and to talk with them again.”
Thanks for pushing back, Franziska!
Thanks, David. That perspective can give us consultants courage to ask – and get first nibs on the next project. (Had to get the cocoa pun in.)